文案分享发朋友圈的低调搞笑文案，幽默风趣，治愈系极高！

一，双十一买的东西不是很多吧 也就花了一个亿

There are not many things to buy on the Double Eleven, so it cost 100 million yuan

二，难受了，我竟然错过了悉尼歌剧院的演出！因为他非得拉着我去挑什么房子，一个千佛山脚下的普通别墅而已，至于这么着急嘛，非得刚找到工作就买。

What a pain! I missed the performance at Sydney Opera House! Because he had to pull me to pick a house, an ordinary villa at the foot of Qianfo Mountain, but in such a hurry, he had to buy it as soon as he found a job.

三，我一天吃好多东西 体重都不变 好羡慕那些容易长肉的 不像我吃那么多都不吸收 好烦

I eat a lot of things a day, and my weight doesn’t change. I envy those who grow meat easily, but I don’t eat so much and don’t absorb it.

四，用了好多年手机，我才知道原来手机没电了可以充电不用买新的，还有前两天又去换车，4s店才告诉我原来汽车是可以加油的。

It took me many years to use my mobile phone, and I didn’t know that my original mobile phone could be recharged without buying a new one. I also changed my car two days ago, and the 4s shop told me that my car could be refueled.

五，为什么会有这么多人问我要微信啊，明明今天也没有化妆啊

Why are there so many people asking me for WeChat, and I obviously don’t have makeup today

六，说出来挺不好意思的，我是最近才知道鸡蛋有壳的，以前都是吃管家剥好的，一直以为鸡蛋都是白色的软软的

I am very embarrassed to say it. I only recently learned that eggs have shells. I used to eat them and peel them. I always thought that eggs were white and soft

七，酒我是不太懂的，但是这个酒庄据说有好几百年的历史，勉为其难给投资人一点面子吧。其实我内心想说气泡水他不香吗？

I don’t know much about wine, but this winery is said to have a history of several hundred years, so it is reluctant to give investors some face. In fact, I want to say in my heart that bubble water doesn’t smell good?

八，最近去试完衣服顺路回家都买几捧玫瑰，老公突然就说要买一个带院子的房子，种满玫瑰叫园丁专门打理，但是玫瑰看久了也一般啊

Recently, I went to try on my clothes and went home to buy a few roses. My husband suddenly said that I would buy a house with a yard. When I planted roses, I asked the gardener to take care of them, but the roses were average after a long time

九，每天就大鱼大肉胡吃海塞，是个人就腻啊还有家里的珠宝首饰太多了堆的屋子乱难收拾，请了三十多个丫环都收拾不过来。为什么因为屋子太大了呗

Every day, if you eat the sea plug with big fish and big meat, you will be tired if you are a person! And there are too many jewels at home! It’s so messy that more than 30 maids are invited to pick up the house. Why? Because the house is too big!

十，双十一买的房子还挺宽敞，不过我还是喜欢小空间有安全感

The house bought by Double Eleven is quite spacious, but I still like a small space with a sense of security

十一，前天过生日，老公给我转了10万块钱说叫我自己买衣服，他有个一千万的生意要谈，没空陪我。这种只知道给钱的男人是不是该换了？

On my birthday the day before yesterday, my husband transferred 100,000 yuan to me and told me to buy clothes myself. He had a business of 10 million yuan to discuss and had no time to accompany me. Should this man who only knows how to give money be changed?

十二，烦人，每次去厨房拿点吃的都要走断腿，太远了。

It’s annoying. Every time I go to the kitchen to get something to eat, I have to walk my leg. It’s too far.